Not Ashamed

I saw this photo a few days ago while skimming a Rebelution Tour update and the photo and caption have stuck with me constantly:

"With every head up and every eye open . . ."

(Link to the Gaithersburg stop on the 2008 tour - in case you want to see the rest: Flicker )

It makes me think of Romans 1:16. So many times when we do salvation calls we say "Now, everyone bow your heads and close your eyes - you don't need to be looking around..." Why? If you are not ashamed of the gospel - truly not afraid of the gospel and willing to take that step, then why are you hiding? Sure standing up could be difficult but that's what Christianity is! You know that that commitment is probably much more real when you're going to stand like the guy above in thousands of people. This just really struck me. HE is not ashamed of the gospel of Christ! Also, why should He be ashamed? We are rejoicing with him that he has made that decision! That's exciting! Anyway, I just felt like sharing. :)

On the Upswing

Thank you all so much for praying for me! I REALLY appreciate it! I believe the antibiotics are working since my cough is finally getting sparser and I was able to be up all day yesterday without a nap/rest for the first time in five days. Yesterday was still hard physically because of my intense coughing fits which were worse then they had been all week. Scott made me tea and made me drink it lol It helped for alittle while but I don't know if the taste was worth the benefit.... ick. lol (no offense to all you tea drinkers) Today my cough has been almost non-exsistent though. Praise God! I may be moving out of the infirmary today since I'm not supposed to be contagious anymore and my cough is lessening. It'll be weird because staying in the infirmary is so different then the other cabins and now it feels like home! (I even put my name on the door :) (Room #3, down the hall and to the left haha) If I have a chance I'll post some pictures later.

So now I'm in riflery which has been very interesting. It's just so not me. a gun is one thing but riflery instructor? lol I'm amused watching the reactions people make when they find out that's my job.

Prayer Requests? Yes, I have some. On top of continued recovery, please pray for my transition back to staff because right now I'm having a hard time getting my work ethic back to what it was. I'm tired, ready to be done and feeling a bit apathetic towards multiple things. Also, I'm dealing with a few relationship issues and then there's a big struggle I'm having with something in my life and I don't know what it is. All the other things tie into it and I know I'm struggling but I can't identify the problem yet so please pray for that situation cause I'm really struggling and I don't know why. (I know that was redundant - sorry)

Thank you so much to all of you who have been praying for me - I really appreciate it!

Proverbs 16:9
The mind of a man plans his ways but the Lord determines his steps

Health Update

Hello everyone! After battling a fever all weekend (with the highest being a 102.7 for people who care to know) I was brought to the doctor this morning and put on an antibiotic and a high strength cough suppressant. They weren't really sure what I've got but it could be an upper respiratory something, walking pneumonia or the beginning of pneumonia. It's not bronchitis. So, I'm on the mend thankfully. I've been feeling better and have more energy but it only lasts so long and I can't do anything high energy. Brad REALLY REALLY wanted me counseling this week and was still planning on having me do that until this morning. I've now been moved to rifelry (which isn't exactly me lol...) and I don't know what God's doing but I know He's still in control. My Dentist's (and elder at our church) favorite saying which has become my mom's favorite saying is, "It is what it is". I've thought about that a good bit this weekend but I've changed it: "It is what it is - God is in control" and I know He is. I know He has been working through this whole thing and I'm content in His plans no matter how weird they seem to be to me. (Like rifelry.... me? lol - He knows what He's doing).

Thank you all who have been praying for me - I REALLY REALLY appreciate it and would really appreciate you continue to do so. I'm so thankful to the Lord for how He works and still how He works through and during things like illness. I could be much worse off - He's just forcing me to learn humility and take a break.

EDIT: I just read Rachel's update and the wierd thing with my shin is gone - praise God! :)

Another Update

Hey, it's Rachel updating for Courtney again. I was visiting yesterday, and since she's contagious she can't use the computer, so she asked me to keep you posted. :) So, yesterday in the afternoon her temperature was at 102, and then in the evening it was 101.6. She was still feeling tired and feverish with a cough. The nurse wasn't giving her medicine to get rid of the fever because the medicine would get rid of the fever, but not the actual bug, and would probably prolong the other symptoms. After the last update, she was in bed in the infirmary, and was planning on spending the night there too. Please pray for her be feeling better, as she has plans off-camp this weekend and was hoping to be able to do those. As well as for feeling better for this next week of camp. She was supposed to be counseling, but there is a very good chance that she won't be because of her illness. So, also pray that whatever job she is doing that God would be continuing to use her to reach campers, even if she's not counseling. And finally, one of her shins was also bothering her (possibly shin splints) , so pray that her shin would be healed as well. Thanks for the prayers, I know she really appreciates them!

Update

Well, here's the update on Courtney's health typed by Rachel...She was in bed for 14 miserable hours overnight with 100.4 fever, trying and not completely successfully resting. This morning at 10:30, she visited the nurse, and had a 99.6 fever. So, she is unfortunately quarantined and on the BRAT (Bananas, Rice, Applesauce, and Toast) diet. Keep praying for her as she is unable to clean, or guide her crew, or hug anybody -including me :( Also, someone will have to take over for close out chores after campers leave.

Prayer Please!!!

Well - It's happened. My body can't take it anymore and I'm running a 100.4 fever (after having a cold for a week and a half and having a cough for three days). I'm on my way to bed at 6:30 with a crew finishing the dining hall. For the first time all summer I'm starting to wish I could go home for alittle while and I know it's only by God's strength I'll make it through these next few weeks. Things have been going fairly well but my crew isn't exactly in the best state to be left with out guidance. I'm trying not to worry about it knowing that it's not the biggest thing in the world, but please pray for a quick recovery. The other thing is that I am contagious so no one can hug me - which if you know me, is also very difficult. I've been holding back tears slightly unsuccessfully for the last two or three hours. Please just pray for me - I'm having a really hard time with this.

He is faithful!

Well, the last day and a half were difficult as I've adjusted to my position, become tired and tried to figure out how to assign positions, work with an unmotivated crew member, figure out the best person for each job, learn not to be a perfectionist, try to drive the five wheeler smoothly (lol) and more.... but this afternoon, in the midst of my frustration and confusion about myself and how I react to things and what I should make the priority (resting, reading my bible/praying, or reaching out to my crew members) in my little freetime, I got a letter and a package. The package was from someone from youth group - homemade molasses cookies which were AMAZING. The note said "I hope these brighten your day" and they sure did but the letter I also got from the same person was what made me beam. I was so excited to see God working in her life after these last fews years of us talking through things and to see her new passion for God that I couldn't help but smile and my heart was happy. I've been joyful ever since. After getting the letter I went to a dock and just sat for 45 minutes talking to God, thinking, reading my bible and laying in the sun. It was beautiful. God is so faithful to provide encouragement when needed and so faithful to work through the seeds we have planted. I have begun to see fruit from seeds I have had the privledge to plant over the last two years in a couple of lives. Last week I had two sisters in my cabin who requested me after having me as their counselor last year. After this whole year, and them once again being in my cabin, they gave their lives to Christ (and I'm much more confident in their decision then in most). It's all in His timing - I just need to faithfully serve Him and glorify Him in everything I do.

Switching gears completely-
Never underestimate the power of encouragement. This may be in the form of a "Great job!" in passing, "Love you !" shouted down the dining hall, or a "Hey, I just wanted to let you know that we really appreciate your hard work - keep it up!" from someone poking their head around the corner. God has used these little comments from random people to encourage me through the sometimes difficult adjustment to my position - and just when I needed it. So - pass on a short encouragement to someone in your life today! Maybe it's a parent, a spouse, a sibling or a friend. Give them a "Good job", an "I love you", an "I appreciate you" or all of the above. Build up the body of Christ today by sharing some encouragement with your fellow "partakers of grace" (see below post)!

With love and joy through our faithful Lord for the way He works in so many lives,
Courtney Lynn

Here it goes!

Ready or not - here it is - I'm head custodian - *gulp*. lol No, actually it's going pretty good so far. I've already found potentially problem areas but they're in God's hands and I'm not going to worry about it. I'm concerned but not worried. It's so weird to have an hour in the middle of the day where I don't HAVE to do anything! CRAZY - and I'm loving it! lol I stayed up way to late last night (2:30am) but at least now I've got a whole bunch of stuff done and I'm not feeling this tremendous pressure of undone things. God is still working in my life in so many ways - and so many of them are so little. It's so beautiful and wonderful to see Him work. I'm a minor staff counselor this week so I think that's God's way of helping me get my sleep this week - lol. I was supposed to counsel next week and then do something else the last camp week. Well, I found out today that I'm scheduled to counsel both of the last two weeks. So that's kindof exciting though it means that I'm not going to be able to spend any time with Jessie before she leaves early - which kindof saddens me.

I have a on my crew who is very needy and I have known since mid week last week that God wanted me to love in the hard way and reach out to her even though I want to do other things. Please pray for love from me and for God to open her heart to His truth. She's on staff more as a ministry to her then her a ministry to us. So just pray that God would give me the strength to love as He does to the three s on my crew whom I honestly believe God has put in my path to reach out to, minister to and .... counsel :)

Love you guys!

ps. I havn't recieved much for letters recently.... :(

HALLELUJAH!!!!!

It is such a load of my shoulders to know that my graduation thank you cards which have kept me so busy and have weighed on my mind for six weeks are - as of 11:20pm on July 19, 2008 - are finially DONE! Yah!!!

Sorry, just had to share that glorious moment with you all - some of you know how much that's been weighing on me cause these last ones are so late.

Head Custodian has already begun....

Well, I wasn't really expecting my position to start until next Monday but that surely didn't turn out to be the case. When I finished most of my counseling duties at about twoish I headed over to the dinning hall to find out that the people that were supposed to take care of cleaning if didn't do anything but vacumm and all the sweeping, mopping, scrubbing, garbages, bathrooms and the basement still needed to be done..... So I began working on that with a few people and eventually it came down to just Mr. Browning and I scrubbing and mopping. Then after that I spent an hour collecting dirty rags from around camp, checking supply amounts and spot cleaning the Sumac carpet which had a bunch of stains on it. I had expected to have some resting time after counseling stuff and to have time to finish paperwork from this week but just before 6pm I was still working and thankfully I was invited to dinner at Jessie's grandparents for dinner so I got to stop working. When I got there though I was so exhausted I just dropped into a chair and the week of pressures, the emotions of saying goodbye to a college bound friend, the exhaustion all around from running at top speed all day starting at 6am, my concerns from last week, my To Do list and trying to keep from crying all afternoon and just pushing on just finially caught up and I cried unintentionally. Really I just needed to be alone (finially!) for thirty minutes and then I had a great relaxing time at Bibbie's (Jessie's grandma) and when we got back to camp Jessie and I just sat in the car talking for an hour because she was gone on an adventure trip this week and it seemed like we hadn't talked in forever. So, now I'm the official carrier of the keys and the radio - oh, and I was authorized to drive the five wheeler.... lol

Please keep me in your prayers because I'm working with a group of three s who I know could pose some intresting situations and I know one will require patience and alot of love. I also know that God wants me to be reaching out to the minor staff this week which won't be easy.

I will be out of my comfort zone, in charge of something I don't feel competent in, really tired AND trying to reach out to love and be patient with various people - so your prayer is greatly appreciated. I know that God has lots to teach me this week and it's unlikely that I'll make a HUGE disaster so I'm not really worried - I think I'm actually more scared then anything. Scared of the unknown and scared of being without people I can go to if I'm having a rough time. God wants to teach me so much I know - I'm just scared to learn.

Well, it's almost 10pm and I need to go downstairs and finish working on the custodial laundry and sorting the lost and found (which, by the way mom, Andrew left his Old Navy sweatshirt here - if I remember, I'll send it home with Mrs. Lehto).

Love to you all and thank you so much for reading my blog!

A new position: Head Custodian

Next week the camp head custodian (Jessie) is counseling and I'm taking over her role as head custodian. We're both nervous about how things are going to go because we're both so far out of our comfort zone. We keep talking about how crazy this is going to be!

PRAYER REQUEST

One of my campers told me today that she wanted to talk to me while we were canoeing. A storm came through and I asked her if she wanted to just go and talk and she said yes. During our 30 minute conversation she asked all sorts of questions. She has been raised in a non-Christian home and wants to know if there is a God and I've been starting from square one. In the first thirty minutes we talked about Creation and the fall of man since one of her questions was how could dinosaurs have been before Christians??? Oh how I'm thankful for all the creation confrences I've been to! Please keep her in your prayers her name is Monica. She is a sweetheart and is waiting for me to finish up a few things so we can talk some more. Pray that her heart would be opened and for discipleship oppertunities after she goes home.

Partakers of Grace

Philippians 1:7 talks about how the Philippians are "partakers of grace" with Paul. I was thinking about this today and wrote the following in my journal:

It is not because of what they've accomplished or what good people they are - it's because they share the common bond of receiving grace. This is the common bond we share as staff. It is definitely not out personalities or "accomplishments" in life that are the same and bring us together. No, the thing that brought us together is Christ's love and His grace by allowing us salvation. The thing that keeps us together is His grace - us not getting what we deserve (in payment for our sins) - His continual grace to us here that we have all been partakers in this summer.

I have definitely received the grace of God this week, through His faithfulness to provide. Update to come! (I have to teach an activity class in 30 seconds!)

As signs on my hands.... literally :)

Deuteronomy 6:5,6,8

5"You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.

6"These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart.

8"You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead.

I use the back of my hand frequently as a "palm" pilot. (Yes, you were supposed to laugh at that). Well, I wanted to write a few verses on myself so as not to forget them so I got creative to make them look more decorative and to have space. They have faded today and I didn't rewrite them again this time(because their purpose is over, I've memorized them or I needed the space to write new more applicable verses!), but they're great and I thought I'd share. Also, I guess you can see my struggles through my verse choices. :)

On the back of my hand:
Isaiah 45:9c "Will the clay say to the potter, 'What are you doing?' "

On my wrist (It's a bracelet that wraps around :)
Psalms 55:22a "Cast your burden upon the Lord and He will sustain you"

On my arm:
Romans 13:14
"But put on the Lord Jesus Christ and make no provision for the flesh in regards to its s."

Some scary things you just won't forget...

The only other thing that comes to mind when I think of life threateningly scary moments in my life was the a c c i d e n t in Chicago. (For those who don't know about that : We were 2 seconds away from being in an a c c i d e n t in Chicago and since my Dad's a trained military medic he jumped out and was first on the scene. We were there for 45 minutes as my Dad helped out in the middle of a five lane Chicago highway about an hour after dark.)

Tonight was a normal fourth of July evening. After our family camp responsibilities here at camp we piled in our cars and headed to Northland Baptist Bible College (which is near here) for their annual large fireworks display (they have quite the turnout) over the lake on their property. We got "seats" right on the lake and it was great. It was fun as the speaker finished and the fireworks started. We laid on our backs and watched the fireworks light the starry sky. And then it happened. A large firework blew up just over or on the dock. It formed a half circle on top of the lake. My first thought was the people over there - but then it got really scary. Because of the upset and situation on the dock, the next firework was launched straight across the lake and I turned just in time to see it explode in the middle of a crowd of people. At that point I was scared for my life. It was a helpless scared since there was nothing I could do since I was already laying on the ground and getting up and running wouldn't do any good. I didn't know how many were potentially on their way across the lake and it was a slight moment of . I remember thinking "we might get hit" and "this must be what war is like". There wasn't time to think anything else and if I did I don't remember. All of the above happened in a period of 5 or 10 seconds and then Rachel and I just grabbed eachother and started praying. A few seconds later we were told to get away from the lake quickly. So we grabbed our stuff and got back. The medics were around a person that was down and I just hoped beyond hope that the person would be okay. Rachel and LeeAnnah and I formed a circle and prayed shakely - it was all we could do. They asked everyone to clear out so we made our way back.

I remember being shook up after the a c c i d e n t and it feels similar now. It was scary and I don't know how to respond, just like I didn't know then. I thank God for protecting us and that it wasn't worse.

There are some things you just never forget...

When best friends go out on the lake for an hour...

And when best friends spend too much time in the dark wandering around looking for people....

I found him! Prince Charming! And guess what?! We're engaged!!!

Pictures

I've added pictures from the last few weeks to different posts and to today's post - enjoy :-)

Misc weekend pictures

Riding in Dan's mustang convertible on the way home from church :) That was WAY fun!

PQT's on Big Rock

After a long week of custodial Jessie and I sleep in the car while waiting for the s to finish shopping.

The view from my favorite spot at camp

Junior Camp

Here's some pictures from this week:

We won cabin cleanup!!!

Campers right before they left

My g i r l s on a faith walk

Crazy g i r l s

More crazy g i r l s...

She caught a fish!!!

The Junior Campers (3rd - 5th - ages 8-10) Are Definitely Here!

You know it's Junior Camp at LLBC when the first meal (Monday night dinner) you look around and notice that all of the counselors already look exhausted. :-)

You know you're a Junior Camp Counselor when everyone's always asking you to talk but they never leave you time to.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

This week I have nine s - a full cabin. One of my campers is from last year and when she came in she said "I hoped that I would have you but I knew it wouldn't be possible". :-) I thought it was cool to here that she wanted to be with me again. She's even sleeping above me again: Same cabin, same counselor, same bed.

Junior campers always leave me with mixed feelings. I love their energy and excitement and how much they look up to you and I wish I had more time to spend with them to get to know eachone (they leave on Thurs. instead of Sat.). However, they are physically and mentally exhausting! They interrupt, always have questions, and aren't great at following instructions. So for me Junior campers are a love relationship! lol

Last night I was woken up at 11:15 (I went to bed at 10pm! Yahoo!) and walked a crying camper to the bathhouse. I woke up at 1am and I don't even remember if that was camper related or not. And then at 2am I was woken up to a homesick camper who hadn't fallen asleep yet (poor thing!) and was apparently so upset that she sweated so much that she soaked her bed. We do have bed wetters (BW's) but there were sweat signs not bed wetting ones lol. But, I had to do the same as a BW - go to the laundry room and get new sheets. When I was woken up at 2am I still felt sick to my stomach but I said a quick "God give me strength" prayer and rolled out of bed. I decided last night that I'm not looking forward to mothering infants! lol The one hour sleeping blocks drive me crazy!

Prayer Requests:

- Health: I havn't felt to well and we've had the stomach flu hit camp these last few days so prayer for that for me and the staff.

- Staff: We're starting to get tired and some of the staff have a ton of stuff to do outside of their current responsabilties. Due to injuries and illness a bunch of people got shuffled at lunch Monday. They responded graciously but I know it messed up the schedules and plans for a few people and some people who were supposed to get a counseling break are now counseling.

- Me: For energy and passion for these campers. It's so easy for me to just "survive" the week but I need to be pouring myself into these kids. For me camp is the norm now but for them it's still new and exciting and maybe even scary. Pray also for my spiritual life that I would stay "fit" and have time to spend with God and that He would renew me.

I'm gonna open my letter from the Fayas's and the package I just got from my parents! Talk to you later!

PS> WHITE RABBIT!